Hale and Pace discovered under Siberian permafrost
Long-extinct 'comedy' duo Gareth Hale and Norman Pace - thought to of died out decades ago - have be unearthed in almost perfect intact condition under the Siberian permafrost by a Russian oil drilling company.
The perfectly-preserved light entertainers - who created a hit charity single in 1991 with 'The Stonk' - were last seen after a rubbish dramatisation of the famous 'Dalziel and Pascoe' detective series.
Archaeologists had previously believed that the mirthsome pair had simply died out and vanished without a trace. Scientists now hope they can clone Hale and Pace using fragments of DNA implanted into stem cells from Thatcher-era comedy duo 'Smith and Jones', who are known to be alive and well and living in a retirement home near Penwith.
A BBC insider told us that this is great news for the television world.
"Hale and Pace were comedy gold - I loved 'The Management' and that potty-mouthed children's TV presenters thing they did. We are already getting busy writing parts for them into upcoming Eastenders scripts, and 'I'm a Celebrity...' producers have been ringing on the phone all morning. With nothing on the box these days except fucking reality shows, having a couple of zany ex-teachers doing vaguely amusing and slightly desperate comedy sketches on the schedule will be sweet relief for us all."
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