Weird Bloke in the Pub Says.. Weird Bloke in the Pub Says.. "You know that AIDS? It was some dirty bugger shagging a monkey that caused that. Makes my guts turn thinking of it - he must of been desperate to fuck a monkey. Barp!"
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Comment > Opinion - Deepak Chopstick

- The Outside Toilet - British Comedy, Toilet Humour, Office Jokes and Political Satire

'They are hoodies, yes - in that their spiritual minds have been hooded, leaving them unable to orchestrate with their quantum transcendental selves.'

It was with some some sadness, and yet not great surprise, that I watched the London Riots unfold on my Hitachi 50" plasma screen television. And it was indeed no great surprise, when we know that this is a generation raised without spiritual awareness, whose essences are informed only by materialism, whose intrinsic thirst for greater spiritual understanding has been completely usurped by the need for the fastest car or latest mobile phone, such as my custom gold-plated iPhone 4 3G+.

From where did this stem? I have some theories on the matter, but it is more important, I feel, to tackle the problem as it stands. And the problem is clearly a lack of a spiritual connection to the higher consciousness of the godhead - that transcendental intelligence made manifest in our quantum souls, informing both the individual and the world at large of the great spiritual ego-connection through means of synchronicitous events and meditative enlightenment. These sad, hooded youths must understand that our spiritual dimension is as much a part of reality as any material thing they might desire - such as my Alienware six-core computer workstation with Nvidia graphics, for instance, or my Hummer - because it has been proven to exist by quantum physicists, who have made it clear that a quantum conciousness exists and of which we are all a part.

You only need to look at the looting that took place during these riots to see how steeped in materialism these young people are; hooded not with clothing, but with the permeating desire for gross corporate products - a desire that blots out even the tiniest glimpse of how our minds are truly orchestrated to be in concert with the higher quantum workings of the spiritual universe. Yes, they might want an iPad 2 like mine, but what they need is guidance on how to become the true spiritual essences they really are.

Perhaps, if you know one of these hooded (and yes, I do mean that in the immaterial sense) youths, you might endeavour to recommend the guidance that is already out there, such as my book, Getting In Touch With Your Quantum Spiritual Angel, An Emotive Guide (available from Amazon and all retail outlets, £59.99), or my DVD and Blu-Ray meditation course, Essential Medicine: Meditation As Medicine For Your Essential Quantum Transcendence (available from Amazon, Play.com and all retail outlets: DVD set £79.99, Blu-Ray set £129.99). And lest I be accused of self-promotion, let me also recommend my good friend Pansy Moonshag's Harnessing The Quantum Spiritual Power Of Your Personal Transcendental Syncrodestiny guides (Avail through all good retail outlets, or can be orded direct from my publishing and distribution arm: £29.99 each, or £99.99 for the full set).

With such help, perhaps these troubled souls will be troubled no longer - and perhaps we'll see not unboxing videos on Youtube (where no doubt they would be unboxing their ill-gotten material wares) but unhooding films instead - spiritual unhooding films, let me hasten to add, where we might see the joy, wonder and sheer spiritual nourishment that comes of shedding the materialistic husk to reveal the wondrous and enlightened nut at the heart of the quantum fruit.

Love

Deepak (sent from my Blackberry Playbook)





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Monday, 20 May 2013