Alan Green’s A-Z of the Premier League

In Sport on Thursday, 11 August 2011

Premier League predicted highlights from Alan Green

To celebrate the start of the new season of the ‘greatest league in the world’, The Outside Toilet brings you an A-Z of our predicted highlights from the nation’s favourite commentator.

You may want to tick them off as you hear them. We predict that you’ll get at least 20 ticked off by the end of August.

Appalling, absolutely appalling
Boring
Contemptible
Dire, absolutely dire
Everton are playing atrociously
Fulham are playing atrociously
Goodness knows why anyone pays to watch such rubbish
Honestly, this is an appalling game
I’ve never seen such rubbish in my life
Just who do you think you are, Sepp Blatter?
King’s out injured for Tottenham
Ludicrous decision, referee!
Magnificent, not!
Negative tactics from Blackburn
Oh come off it, this is poor
Pathetic
Quite honestly this is the worst game I’ve ever seen
Ridiculous decision, referee!
Scandalously poor
Terrible
Utterly abysmal
Very poor
Woeful
Xavi’s anonymous in this game (Champions League)
You’ve got to be kidding me, referee
Zamora’s having a dreadful game